Tuesday, April 19, 2005

Paging Peg Bushey

We had a bit of a scare today that turned into an educational experience. Last night my wife Julie was feeling a bit faint, seeing the tunnel that many people describe when they are light headed. I got her into bed and, while we were concerned, it just seemed like one of those things women have to deal with in pregnancy that I unfortunately have no power to control. The doctors had upped her daily insulin dose as well as the number of shots from 1 to 4 per day, so we figured that must be the cause. She'd also had a similar incident at work a few weeks ago where she blacked out completely, but still we weren't overly concerned.

However, around 10 this morning Julie called me as I was preparing for a doctor appointment of my own and told me she had phoned the OB about her symptoms from the previous evening. Apparently the doctors WERE very concerned and Julie was waiting to hear back from them as to whether she should be admitted to the hospital! I quickly found the number for my appointment, left a message canceling, and almost immediately got a call from Julie with the verdict: we were headed to the triage unit!

Now, while "triage" sounds pretty serious, we arrived on the birthing floor to find a very nice and relaxed nurse at a reception desk. It became apparent that this was the staging area for pregnancy related issues. After taking some blood for tests, we soon learned that a VERY young expectant mom was just next door to our cubicle with a woman we could only guess was her mother. There was no evidence of a father and her young voice was clearly filled with fear. After a few minutes, the nurse went in to say that her baby was coming and that she would be moved to a room shortly. It was kind of exciting to hear about another expectant mom, but a conversation that was to soon follow nearly brought tears to my eyes.

By now everyone has seen or heard stories of young unwed mothers, whether it be on the news, in the paper, or a Lifetime movie of the week usually starring the mother from Family Ties. In this case it was hard to determine the age of our new "neighbor," but her unwed status became very clear. After being told she was about to deliver she called her father to tell him the news, but by the time the conversation ended her excitement had turned quickly to sadness. "What did he say?", asked the mother. Fighting back tears, the soon to be mom replied, "I told him he was going to be a grandpa soon and he said, 'Well, not really. You'd have to be married for that to be official.' He made me feel awful." There was a bit of a pause, after which her mother said quietly, "That's just the way he is."

Soon after that exchange, the nurses came for the two women and we didn't hear any more about them. We both felt a bit guilty having listened to their private conversation, but I think we both wonder how she made out and, perhaps more importantly, how she makes out when she goes home. I have often wondered how much parents' behavior affects their children. And while I have come to no great conclusions, I know that every child, regardless of what sins they allegedly commit, deserves nothing less than unconditional love from those they love unconditionally.

As for us, all the tests they ran came back normal and any concern about preeclampsia, the condition they thought most likely to cause her symptoms, seems to have abated for now. We ended up waiting nearly 4 hours for the results and I tried to keep Julie entertained. I'd make up jokes, tell stories, and use the bed straps as a makeshift slingshot to gently "thwack" Julie (she'd probably take exception to my use of the word 'gently') in her side. At one point, over the loudspeaker came the following announcement: "Paging Peg Bushey, paging Peg Bushey". Right on cue, both of us starting laughing uncontrollably, causing the fetal heart monitor Julie was hooked to screech just as loudly. Whether that name ranks up there with "Amanda Huginkiss" and "I.P. Freely" or if it was just the fact that we'd been staring at the patients bill of rights in English and Spanish translations for hours, I can't really say. But I'll never forget this day, or the young woman next to us, and I wonder how her day (as well as Ms. Bushey's) turned out.

Wednesday, April 13, 2005

Time Flies

To say that time has been passing quickly has become the understatement of our lives! My wife will be 26 weeks tomorrow and the idea that Julie & I will be bringing an infant home in less than 3 months is beginning to settle in our collective consciousness. I wouldn't say that it's hit me from out of the blue as it is actually more gradual than I expected. It's not something you notice from one day to the next, but when Thursday comes and another week has passed you really notice the changes.

In my last entry we had just ordered the nursery furniture and three days later it was at Babies R Us! The three pieces made their way here on Saturday, I had the crib up later that day, and the next few days were spent cleaning out the nursery. You can view the pictures here. Julie & I are both very pleased with all the pieces we bought, although we may need one more before the baby arrives. We also have a glider/rocker chair coming from Simon's Baby Furniture in Pittsford, but that's being built custom and won't be here for a few weeks yet.

The other news is that our OB, in consultation with another doctor in the practice, has been raising Julie's insulin dosage steadily over the last few weeks. However, she was able to take it all in 1 shot per day. Then this week they decided to space it out and raise the number of shots to 3. One for morning, another before dinner, and the last before bed! She's being a real trooper about the whole thing and shows me how much strength she has each and every day. Sure she has tough days, but she always seems to rise above it all.

So, we continue to look forward to our new arrival, but we're also developing an appreciation for the weekends we have together. In many ways they have become routine: go to Wegmans, get to the mall for those little things, a required stop at Babies R Us, and an early dinner. However, we know full well that things will change soon and, while we do lament the loss of our "independence" from time to time, we're so looking forward to sharing weekends, trips, and every day for about the next 18 years (give or take a few) with our little one. Oh how the time will fly...but we wouldn't have it any other way.

Monday, April 04, 2005

Together Again

It's been a couple weeks since my last post, but not because of a lack of baby related happenings! Julie & I have been making our final decisions on the nursery and ordered the furniture over the weekend. I've already had a request from my dad to put pictures of them up as soon as we can, so I will debut the nursery with the kid's stuff when we get it set up. The two larger pieces, an armoire and a changing table will come fully assembled, but I'll have to put the crib together and will likely have my father in law's help (as well as his truck!). It's supposed to be here in about 7 days, so we're hopeful there will be a debut by this time next week. Stay tuned for any updates!

Over the last week or so both Julie & I have been reading ahead on what to expect the first few days, weeks, and months after the baby arrives. There's a lot out there for us to know! I won't speak for Julie, but deep down I have a feeling that we'll have instincts to guide us for most of it and that a lot of trial and error will be involved. I'll warn both sets of grandparents right now that there will probably be a number of late night phone calls! They may be filled with reports that the screaming in the background must be bubonic plague when a diaper rash is a more likely prognosis! We'll do our very best to stay calm at all times when we're on the hotline, but we can't make any promises.

As I mentioned in an earlier entry, I've been thinking back to my childhood and the things my parents introduced me to as a little one. They are the usual suspects: Peter Rabbit, Curious George, Paddington Bear, and just about every educational program on PBS. But none is more treasured that my old friends who lived on Sesame Street. Fortunately, they are still around and more present than ever in our culture. They weren't just TV shows since they were a constant presence in books, stories, and my imagination. I couldn't imagine our progeny without them! And no other characters were more beloved than Bert & Ernie.

To my eternal dismay, recent commentators have questioned their "lifestyle" in a PC world run amuck, but as a child I always had a better explanation: they were brothers silly! To a young stocky boy who grew up with a tall sprouting twig of a sibling, it didn't ever seem that odd that they slept in the same room and shared their daily lives. So, whether or not others think they were brothers, those lovable Muppets were best of friends...and now they're together again to fill another child's imagination with their adventures. And, by the way, did you notice that everyone can see Snufalufagus now? What is up with that!?!